By the way...

I had a nice, long weekend. Beautiful day off yesterday, relaxing. Got a good night's sleep last night, and did as well as I'm ever going to getting up early for work this morning.

I've been here for just over an hour, and it's been a normal day. Nothing too strenuous.

Even still, despite the fact that everything is good as can reasonably be expected, every time the phone rings I cringe. Every time I actually answer it, there's this little kernel of anger deep down that just wants me to hang up on the caller. And I haven't even gotten one of those calls yet today where it could have been avoided if only the person had read the instructions.

I wonder where that puts me on the job satisfaction scale?

What the fuck, car?

Does it ever seem that once car troubles start happening, they just don't stop?

It started back around Christmas time when I had to have my catalytic converter replaced. In an odd problem, there was a sensor in the converter that had gone bad. That's not the odd part. The catalytic converter was covered by the waranty, but the sensor was not. To the tune of $800. Ouch. Merry Christmas, all.

A couple of months pass and I go to get an oil change. But they can't open the hood, because a cable in the hood mechanism snapped. Replacement, around $140.

Then my battery died about a month or so back. Replacement, approximately $100.

And now today, I'm driving to work, and feel a bump, like something hit the car. There are no other cars near me, so I figure maybe it was just a realy quick, strong gust of wind. Get to work and see that my back bumper on the driver's side rear panel is hanging off. (Note, I then remembered that this also happened Sunday night after the Black Crowes concert, but I thought I had fixed it.) It looks almost like someone had hit it at the show maybe. There's a slight crack in the plastic, and the bumper had separated from it's coupling on the body. I snapped it back into place, but I'm not sure how long it will hold. So, it will probably be back in the shop for another round of "more money than I can afford to spend" fun.

I'm having nightmare flashback to my last couple of cars now (not counting the Corolla.) Those other ones that spent more time in the shop than on the road. But if it starts to get that bad, I swear by all that's holy I'll sell the godamn thing and take the train.
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So I saw Lady in the Water over the weekend. I needed to take some time before offering my opinion though, because I didn't know what my opinion was. For a film that seemed to polarize reviewers into loving it or hating it, I felt pretty much ambivalent about it.

But after a few days of thinking about it, I have to give it a thumbs down. Even realizing what M. Night was trying to do (create a fairy tale), and the storytelling rules that allows, this was a clumsy effort. Not only was there far too much exposition (which I can overlook in the right circumstances), but it was awkwardly done (which aren't those right circumstances.) And even when it wasn't clumsy, it was obvious.

There were some small positive things to hold on to, but in the end not enough to save the film. There were some good kernels of ideas that would have made for good building blocks towards something better, but they largely went unexplored. This would be an extremely difficult film to make under the best of circumstnces, and I can't help but feeling that M. Night's publicly known feuding with Disney affected the movie negatively, whether intentionally or not.

Ultimately, if you're going to try and like this film, it's a matter of acceptance. You have to accept what you're being told as easily as the residents of this Philadelphia apartment complex accept that there is a mythical creature living among them. And in the end, I just couldn't.

Oh, yeah...I almost forgot.

I went and saw the new Pirates of the Carribean over the weekend.

Now, I loved the original PotC. I went into it expecting, "OK, whatever, movie about pirates," and came out thinking, "Holy crap! Cool movie about pirates!" It's not that it's a particularly great movie in any sort of legitimate cinema sense of the word. It is, however, really well done, and probably the most fun and one of the best popcorn, escapism films I've seen. ANd it's got cool pirates. Hell, the alst movie about pirates I saw was "The Pirate Movie." And those pirates weren't cool, they were singing.

So, I went into the new PotC with pretty high expectations. Apparently so did everyone else as it made a ridiculous $120 million I think in it's first weekend. And the verdict? It was pretty good, wasn't as good as the first, but it was excellent in one respect.

With the exception of a very few, and very obvious, films, we all know that sequels aren't as good as the original. Especially in the age of the blockbuster movie. And here's why, in my opinion. The sequel has to be bigger, which means bigger action or laughs or scares (depending on what type of film it is), than the original film. But at the same time, sequels often deal with some, if not all, of the same characters. We already know these characters, they've already been introduced. We know their personalities. The've already had a complete story arc (if the writing was good) in the first film. The writers and producers don't need to introduce them again. As such, the character development for recurring characters in a sequel is rarely as strong. Which, to use the exampke of an action movie, gives us a whole lot of action, but not a lot of character. Not the best combination.

At first it felt like the new PotC was going to fall into this trap, and to be honest it doesn't totally escape it. Pretty much the entire cast from the first film returns, and as far as the three main characters go: Orlando Bloom's character is basically the same. Kiera Knightley's character gets a slight bit of new, and darker, characterization. Johnny Depp's Jack Sparrow actually show a more cowardly and unlikeable side than his loveable buffoonery of the first film.

The story? It's pretty good. It deals with Davy Jones as the main villain, who commands a ship of ha;f undead men who, rather than perish at sea, elect to serve on Jones' ship for 100 years, thereby forestalling their death. (Side effects may include: turning into gruesome sea creatures.) Well, in a bit of non-sensical plotting, Sparrow owes Davy Jones his soul because Jones gave him the Black Pearl (his ship from the first movie) to captain for 13 years. (This being non-sensical, becaus the the rules of this film universe don't specify that Jones gets souls for giving up ships, only for "rescuing" drowning sailors.) The action is pushed forward by this fact, and also by the chase by various parties to get Jack's non-working compass, (seen in the first film.) Actually the compass does work, just not how you think.

Here's where the movie is good. It references the first film well, such as in cases of the compass, or how Jack originally got to captain the Black Pearl. In one of the returning characters, it tells of what happened to Commodore Norrington from the first film. Things like strengthened the film. But even better, PotC 2 and 3 were filmed at the same time. So in case you didn't know, yes it's a trilogy. And this film is probably the best example I've seen of a second film in a trilogy setting up the third. I will warn you, the film does sort of just end, albeit it with a twist, cliffhanger ending. But based on what's set up in this film, you know exactly what the 3rd film is going to be about, but you don't know how it's going to play out. The plot of the third film is pretty much outlined in the last few minutes of this one, but there are a lot of strings left dangling as to just how it's all going to happen. Think of it as a cliff-hanger season finale on TV. And just like TV, we now have to wait to see how it all resolves. I know I'll be there next May.

Will our hero find love this time?

Despite the sappy title, for the most part I'm usually pretty chill with my state of perpetual singleness. I don't worry about it too often, I figure what will happen, will happen. I tend to be very laissez faire about that aspect of my life.

But every now and then, I get a little spark under my ass to consider maybe taking the initiative to do something about that. Yesteday being one of those days. Usually it's sparked off by something or another, and this was no different. In fact I think it was the confluence of two things:

1)Saturday night I had gone out for Matt's birthday to a bar called the Liquor Store in the Alley in Boston. Tupically not a palce I would go ever of my own volition, but it was a special occasion. And despite the fact that the female patrons seemed of the sort that I would have approximately nothing in common with, hot and drunk girls riding a mechanical bull and dancing against poles on a Stripper Audition Stage (my name) are still hot and drunk girls riding a mechanical bull and dancing against poles on a Stripper Audition Stage. It's bound to get the blood flowing, and not all in the direction of the brain.

2)Sunday morning, I woke up not with any remaining thoughts of the previous night, but oddly enough from far out of the blue, a mental image of a very cute (albeit very spoken for) friend of mine in a summer dress, (possibly the single greatest item of a female's wardrobe for those that can wear it well.)

Anyway, between these two occurences, I spent a good part of the day thinking perhaps I should take a little more initiative. After all, it's been long enough that I can legally assume the mantle of the "Sahara" nickname. Of course, since there were no single women hanging around my apartment when I woke up, (unless you want to count the cats, and it's not nearly that dry in the desert), taking said initiative consisted more of just placing an ad on Craigslist. (No, not one of THOSE ads, a serious one; well, as serious as I'm likely to be, that is.)

However, and I've realized, that I am a pretty unlucky combination of two things: picky and shy. The first is normal, hell everyone's picky to some degree. But when added to the second, it's like I'm that square peg looking at nothing but round holes. (Yes, that analogy was specifically chosen so that you can take all the back alley Freudian innuendo you want from it.) I've also realzied that I'm not going to sugarcoat myself for anyone, well at least not personality-wise. (You want to talk about actual physical confectioneries, we can discuss my going rates.) But that's just one game I'm not interested in. That's not to say I'll be dosing anyone with a double barrel blast of pure, unadulterated VMan right from the starting gun. I'll let a tolerance develop. But I will be me in all my crude and left of centered glory, motherfuckers. (All cursing in the previous sentence added simply for effect.) Man, this seems like it's going to be one tall order.

But we'll see what follows over the next few days. Probably nothing, a few emails that go nowhere, then my gradual sinking back into nonchalance. But, hey, you never know. Might as well give it a shot.

I've got nothing....

But I'm feeling bored today, so:

Friday afternoons really are the most boring time of the week. You're still at work, but absolutely nothing is going on. Theoretically it would be a gret time to try and do something creative, but your mind has already packed up and left the building for the weekend. So those three hours between lunch and when you can leave pass like three days because Youtube will only keep you entertained as long as you can think of things you want to watch on it.

So hopefully a little blogging will help whittle away some of the time between now and when I can go get some lasagna dinner and go see the new Pirates of the Carribean with the folks.
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My iPod shuffle really wants me to hear "I Can't Make You Love Me" by Bonnie Raitt. This is the third time in a week it's picked it. I keep skipping it because it's one of the most depressing songs ever, but fine. Why fight it. I'll sit here at my desk and weep.

Two things about this song:

1)Prince does a really good version of it on Emancipation, and
2)For the life of me I can't figure out how to play it and I have no idea why. I've tried, picked up my guitar, tried to figure out the chords and played along, and just can't do it. Which is annoying because it doesn't even sound that hard.
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I find it disturbing when I'm in the bathroom at work and the guy the next urinal over wants to talk. I don't want to hold a conversation with anyone I work with, or anyone really, while they have their penis in their hand. There is no time when that is not awkward.
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Conversational Homonyms

You ever walk by someone having a conversation and the small snippet you hear sounds like something totally different than what it ends up being? I was in the cafeteria today and heard, "....the new Highlander..." as I walked by.

Maybe it's just indicative of my predilections but I immediately got slightly excited and wondered if they were talking about a new Highlander movie or TV series. Then I realized:

1) They're probably talking about the car, and
2) I don't even like the movies or TV show that much to begin with.
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I'm already concerned way too much about fantasy football, and that's bad. It's still a month and a half before the season starts and I'm already worrying about who I would take if I got the #1 pick: Larry Johnson or Shaun Alexander, about what QBs are worth taking after Manning goes, about who some potential sleeper picks could be that hopefully no one else will know about. If I'm having these thoughts already, I'm going to be manic like Tony Montana with a big pile of blow on his desk by the first game of the season.
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Why did I just make a Scarface anaolgy? I don't even particularly like the film, and I'm not a rapper.
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And lastly, one from the "It don't get more rock and roll than this" files. Last week, Motherboar was playing over at the Linwood. The drummer from the band that went on before them, halfway through a song, threw up all over himself. He completed the song without stopping. After the song was over, he went to the corner of the stage and threw up some more. He then went outside, presumably for some air, returned a few minutes later and finished the set.

Unfortunately I missed the entire incident because the Dave Matthews Band was playing at Fenway, and the show got out just as I got into the area. I had to navigate the stalled out traffic caused by thousands of DMB fans and was late to the show.

What are you listening to now?

Depsite all my (mostly internal to myself) bitching that I can't find anything new to listen to, this week was very good. So, some quickie record reviews.

John Mayer Trio - Try. We all know that John Mayer is a huge wuss that thinks your body is a wonderland. However, I started to feel a burgeoning respect for him after his hilarious appearance on the Chappelle Show, and there was always rumors going around that he could really play that guitar. Well, Try is just the proof we needed. This is not the bubblegum-ish pop radio-friendly style that propelled Mayer to the forefront of many female fantasies, but a more muscular blues trio offering. Much more up my alley. My one wish is that there was some more rocking stuff on there. As it is it's like Stevie (Ray Vaughn) Lite. Which is not a bad thing to be. (This is allowing for the fact that I still have a few more songs to listen to; I haven't gotten to hear the entire album yet.) It's also impressive that this entire album is live, and if you beleive the liner notes, thrown together really quickly, because from what I heard, the playing is top notch.

Marc Ford - It's About Time. Marc Ford is the guitar player (usually) for the Black Crowes. This album was recorded back in the period when he had left the band for a while. (I think.) So it's a little older. But I love his playing with the Crowes, so when I found it online recently I ordered myself a copy. Upon first listen it's not bad, but not great. This is not a guitar's players album, it does feature actual songs and not just wanking, but I liken it to the one Keith Richards solo album I have, which is OK, but would you rather hear Keith Richards by himself or with the Stones? Yeah, me too. Pretty good songs, pretty tame production, and some impressive guests on the album. We'll re-evaluate after a couple of listens.

Muse - Black Holes & Revelations. The good thing about Muse is that depsite all the disparate elements of the music they still sound like Muse. Which is to say: pretty awesome. This album is pretty different from their last, but it's still recognizable as them. I wasn't very impressed with the single when I first heard it, but in the context of the album it's a lot more fitting. The bad thing about Muse is that they always sound like Muse. In that in almost every song you hear something that sounds like it might have been in a few other songs by them. Sometimes it's the chord progressions, sometimes the vocal melodies. This album is also no exception to that. But overall, upon first listen, I'm pretty psyched about it.

Butch Walker & the Let's Go Out Tonights - The Rise and Fall of Butch Walker & the Let's Go Out Tonights. I don't know what's up with this super long band name, especially since on his Myspace page, Butch emphatically reasserts that he's a solo artist. Butch has been known in the past for his clever and sarcastic lyrics, and strong songwriting and production skills (in fact so much so that he's actually more known in the industry as a producer than a performer nowadays.) His last album was a little more heartfelt and cut back on the clever and sarcastic, but you can tell just by reading the song titles that the clever and sarcastic is back in force. It's almost too cutesy for it's own good in that regard. But the songs are still really solid, and the production rock solid. And well, I just down with the Butch, so I'm pre-disposed to like this album no matter what. I've listened to it a few times, and although so far it might be my least favorite by him so far, it is growing on me more with each listen. Extra added bonus is that new Butch is usually inspiring for me, such that I came up with some verse music an lyrics (half of which I've already scrapped in search of something better), and some potential chorus progressions (depending on the lyrics and melodies) that are very Butch-esque, which is to say: awesome.

You will believe a man can fly.....or will you?

Here's the thing, I don't have the childhood memories of the Donner Superman movies that a lot of people seem to. I was more a Star Wars/Indiana Jones type kid. That's not to say I didn't like the films (the first two, at least), because I did. But they weren't the intrinsical part of my childhood that they seemed to be for a lot of the other film nerds that were getting all wet about Superman Returns. But of course, I was also quite excited for Superman Returns, even up to renting and re-watching the first two Donner films within the past couple of months to prepare. (For those that don't know, Superman Returns ignores Superman 3 and 4 and takes place approximately 5 years after Superman 2...which is a bit incongruous because mantechnology sure seems to have blossomed in those 5 years. But whatever, it's a small foible and one easily overlooked for the sake of continuity.)

The thing about Superman Returns is that it seems like the Lois and Clark story. This is not intrinsically bad, but all the plot surrounding it feels almost thrown together as an afterthought. Which gives us a lot of wistful glances and poignant, sweeping score in the pursuit of the love quadrangle between Clark, Lois, Superman, and Lois' new beau Richard. Wait, you're saying, Clark, Lois, AND Superman. Make no mistake about it, just as Clark and Superman are distinct characters in and of themselves, Lois' relationship is distinct between the two of them as well.

Now relationships are a great way to drive a film. When done well they're the best way to impel the action, story, and plot. Take for example The Village. A flawed movie, (mostly in the second half; the first half I think is damn near perfect), but the relationship between Ivy, Lucius, and Noah is so strong and the consequences of this relationship so intrinsically determine the actions of the characters that I like this movie a lot more than I would have otherwise. (Also, the amazing cinematography didn't hurt; I thought this was one of the best shot movies I have ever seen.)

However, in the case of Superman Returns, there seem to be two main levels: 1)The Lois and Clark story, and 2)the rest of the plot. And the two don't feel like they match up that well. There are a few certain plot points (one that is hugely spoilerific, so I won't get into it) that bring the two parts together, but in a movie of this length (probably about two and a half hours), a few plot points is not nearly enough.

Now because this disparity was so glaring to me, you'd think I didn't like the film, which is not true. I have enough geek to feel all warm and fuzzy whenever John Williams' original Superman theme played. And of course any of the transferred parts of Marlon Brando's original Jor-El (even if they were used to heavy handedly drive home the Jesus theme). Brandon Routh I thought was a great Christopher Reeves and Kevin Spacey was a better Lex Luthor than Gene Hackman. I realize this may upset some purists, but going back and watching the original two movies recently I realized that Hackman's Luthor was really just too goofy to be taken seriously as an arch-villain. Spacey managed to keep some of the camp of Hackman's Luthor--his scheme, although it would have killed billions in his words, was at it's core also pretty trite--but also he infused the character with some genuine menace. Here was a Lex Luthor I could actually be afraid of. It didn't hurt that his prime sidekick in this wasn't Ned Beatty. Kate Bosworth was no Margot Kidder as Lois Lane, but I'm not sure it's entirely her fault as have a theory about that that is unrelated to Superman, and speaks more towards film in general. I've recently been watching the first two Smokey and the Bandit movies and found myself thinking that Sally Field was really hot in those films. Not because of any overwhelming good looks, although she is pretty, but I realized it was because her character (and the way she played it) was really unique. Likewise, Margot Kidder's Lois Lane was a unique character. She had, in a word, "character". And I found myself thinking that it seems like there's less room in movies for female "characters". Now it seems like female stock characters. I really don't have much in the way of research to back this up right now, as it's a theory I only started thinking about a few days ago, but I can think of only one female character off the top of my head that in recent years really jumped off the screen in her full unique and quirky self, and that's Kate Winslet's Clementine from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. (Which is largely why I am in love with Kate Winslet.)

To put it more succintly (to which I'm sure you're saying, "Yes, please."), it's the difference between characters and people. A stock character in a film feels like exactly that: a character. A unique character feels like a person.

But enough of my dissertation on the roles of women in cinema, and let me finish up Superman Returns. One thing that I was slightly surprised about, although in retrospect I guess I shouldn't be, is that the tone of the movie is a lot closer to that of the first two than I was expecting. Maybe because it's been so long since we've had a Superman movie, that in this era of Hollywood remakes, I felt that this was what it was going to be. Look at the new Batman Begins. Excellent movie, but it is a remake. It's the origin story again, with a new tone, with a moer gritty realism (as much as can be said about a man who dresses up like a bat and fights crime.) I guess subconsciously that was what I was expecting for Superman Returns. But Superman Returns is not a remake. It's a sequel. And as such, it appears that director Bryan Singer made an effort to retain the vibe of the first two films. And he did a good job of it. While being dramatic at parts, it wasn't overly serious. And I guess how could it be when your main character flies around in a skin tight body suit?

Overall it was a decent movie, but flawed. Maybe it didn't make me beleive a man could fly, but it did make me believe tha CGI could. I would see it again, but I'll wait for the DVD.